Pregnancy Loss
Coping with the grief from a pregnancy loss
Communication
- Talk about your baby and your feelings with your partner, family and friends. It may sound trite, but this is an excellent outlet for releasing bottled-up emotions
- Try to resume old relationships and start new ones, as a couple and as individuals
Help from Others
- Admit to yourself and your family when you need help. This can lessen your pain and loneliness
- Accept help from others
- Let others know specific things they can do for you, such as providing food, company or childcare
- Allow family and friends to share your grief and let them offer their support
- Attend a support group. Couples who have "been there" can give support, help and hope
Taking Care of Your Emotional and Spiritual Health
- Read books, articles and poems that provide understanding and comfort so you do not feel alone. Avoid “scare” literature and technical medical publications
- Keep a diary or journal of thoughts, memories and mementos
- Write letters, notes or poems to or about your baby
- Request help or support from your clergy to renew your faith and hope
Big Decisions and Changes
- Don’t move or change jobs or relationships. Wait 24 months before making these changes
- Avoid long trips
- Coping mechanisms and reflexes are impaired, making judgments difficult
- Don’t put away baby clothes until you are ready
- Don’t let others make decisions for you
Caring for Your Physical Health
- Avoid junk foods and fast foods
- Drink eight glasses of liquids (juice, water, soda) each day. It can be useful to keep a measured jug of water in the refrigerator to assure that you drink enough
- Don’t drink caffeine or alcohol because they may cause dehydration, headaches or low back pain. Alcohol also can depress body function and natural emotional expression
- Do something active every day, such as biking, walking, jogging, aerobics or stretching. Even a walk around the block can be useful
- Avoid tobacco because it depletes the body of vitamins, increases the acidity of the stomach, decreases circulation and causes palpitations
- Avoid increased work activity. Maintain rest patterns if you are unable to sleep
- Schedule a physical examination about four months after experiencing a loss because the body is at risk of developing diseases during grief